This weekend, for the second time in 7 years, my husband is leaving town without me. I will be… alone… This is so rare that I am all atwitter trying to figure out how best to use my time. My aloneness, however, includes my toddler. This limits my options. So, I have decided the best plan of action is to embrace my inner glutton. Recently I have been trying to be more moderate in what I eat. I deny myself nothing but I don’t go hog wild. Well, that ends this weekend, my friends. I intend to indulge in an orgy of food.
With my first night of ME time, I am putting the baby to bed at 7pm on the dot and making an old classic. Pesto pizza bagels. These will be followed by almost obsessive eating of chips with sour cream and onion dip. No one will be there to judge how much of this goodness I shove into my mouth. This is my version of Heaven. I don’t want to float on puffy clouds. I want to swim in vats of dip.
Saturday involves my carbonarra recipe. The recipe calls for heavy cream and a pound of bacon. How can you go wrong???? I imagine that I will eat 3 servings throughout the evening. As I have some girlfriends coming over, I will probably double the recipe to be sure there is enough for me. It’s not good hosting to selfishly hide half the meal for personal leftovers after everyone leaves. Make no mistake, this dish is so good that I WOULD do that if I had to.
Sunday starts with breakfast out. I haven’t decided where yet but I intend to get the biggest omelette the world has ever seen. And eat it with sour cream and hot sauce. And lots and lots of hashbrowns. My lunch and dinner choices are many. Buffalo chicken wraps, burgers, chicken enchiladas. The world in my menu at this point. I may even eat America’s #1 Worst Food– Outback’s Aussie Cheese Fries. Men’s Health condemned these fries but I am not a man nor am I interested in health. I am interested in the crack that they sneak into the recipe that makes these fries SO addicting. Sunday night will end with another food binge on the couch– most likely devouring all the evidence, I mean leftovers, of my weekend activities.
When I wake up from my food coma on Monday morning life will be back to normal. Sure, I may be 5 or 20 pounds heavier and I may have guaranteed myself a future bypass but it will have been worth it. If this is my last blog, you know what happened to me. Death by grease and salt. The way I have always wanted to make my exit.
Bravo! Makes me want to join the festivities of food.